This is it! The OFFICIAL PERSONAL HOMEPAGE of that most
malevolent midget mutilator, ODERUS URUNGUS,
lead throat-thing of the most dangerous band on this or any other planet--

GWAR ELECTILE DYSFUNCTION TOUR 2008

THE TEN SICKEST THINGS TO EVER HAPPEN AT/ DURING A GWAR SHOW

By Dave Brockie (a.k.a.) Oderus Urungus

1) DEAD ANIMALS THROWN AT BAND—At various shows in GWAR’s career, the band has been pelted with a dead cat (with an eyeball hanging out of it’s socket), a pair of dead sharks, a dead baby chicken, and a dead armadillo.

2) VOMIT BARRAGE—While performing at the infamous “Vera” squat in Groningen, Holland, the locals showed their love for GWAR by pelting them with cups of rotten dog vomit.

3) ON WITH THE SHOW—After suffering a near-fatal gunshot wound in an attempted car-jacking in Washington, D.C., guitarist Flattus Maximus (Pete Lee), continued to tour, even though he had a full colostomy bag, which would often be filling as the band played.

4) THE ULTIMATE SACRIFICE—During a show at Oakland’s Omni Theatre, a member of the crowd suffered a fatal neck injury after he got crushed by a boots-first balcony diver. Years later at a beach party in the area, a girl who had been hanging out with the band proudly revealed that she was the one responsible for the man’s death.

5) ANOTHER ARGUMENT FOR SHAVED HEADS—During a particularly violent show an unfortunate audience member was thrown up on the stage, inextricably winding his long hair around bassist Beefcake the Mighty’s (Casey Orr) tuning keys. As he stood there, helpless, he proceeded to absorb blow after heavy blow to the face as angry band members vented their frustration upon him. This continued until a GWAR slave appeared with a huge pair of scissors and de-maned the poor kid with a single stroke. 

6) UP TO THE ELBOW—The show at L.A.’s Palace Theatre was going smoothly enough until lead singer Oderus (Dave Brockie) turned around and noticed one of the opening bands tour manager’s, in full view of the audience, attempting to ram his entire arm into the vagina of some passed out chick on the side of the stage.

7) THE PAUSE THAT REFRESHES—After a particularly hot show in Italy, GWAR’s representative of the fairer sex, Slymenstra Hymen (Danielle Stampe), hurried backstage to cool off. Upending a bottle of weird European water over her head, she quickly realized that someone had filled the bottle with hot man-pee.

8) WOODEN YOU KNOW IT? At a show at the infamously inadequate Jax in Springfield, Va., band members were horrified to see the barricade had been shoddily constructed out of flimsy wooden 2x2’s. It was almost instantly destroyed by the moshing crowd, leaving broken stakes jutting into the crowd at eye level. Impalement was barely avoided by the GWAR Slave’s wrapping foam rubber and duct tape around the jagged ends.

9) SHOCKING EXPERIENCE—While performing at the unbelievably crappy Insect Club in Norfolk, Va., lead singer Oderus, drunk as hell, reached up and grabbed the lighting truss, electrocuting and blowing himself several feet through the air until he crashed into the drum set.

10) THE SHOW ITSELF—Undoubtedly the sickest thing to ever happen at a GWAR show is…a GWAR show!

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SLEAZY P. MARTINI, LEGENDARY UNDERWORLD MOGUL, TO RETURN TO THE ROCK STAGE WITH THE MIGHTY GWAR ON THEIR “ELECTILE DYSFUNCTION” TOUR 2008! 

Greeting losers, it is I, the world's shrewdest man, Sleazy P. Martini, manager of GWAR, announcing an entertainment merger between GWAR, Mid-Galactic Wrestling and the 2008 Presidential Election, in a craptacular mashup of a tour we have named “Electile Dysfunction '08.”  Due to popular demand, or cheap club owners that need to be "Martinied", after stiffing me last tour, I have personally come out of my semi-retirement of managing the entire porn industry to make sure that this will be the fairest and squarest test of American Presidential metal we can rig my way. Diebold can't stop the double dollop of degradation and destruction that Clinton and Obama will receive nightly at the hands of Oderus and Bone Snapper, or the torture that will see McCain mc-skinned as the candidates will be forced to prove their Presidential chops in the only arena that matters- the wrestling arena. Yes, all three candidates are on a fight card that also features Bozo Destructo and Sawborg Destructo, as the Desructo-Destucto Express, in a championship tag team match vs. GWAR that will determine Earth's future, for a couple of hours nightly. Yes, the American Presidency and the Mid-Galactic Wrestling belts are on the line, at your local Puko-Plex Organized Death Arena, and you dumb fucks will miss it-- unless you steal your mom's credit card and get tickets now! 

It's politics decided by death sport, the kind of election America deserves. 

Also on the bill will be Kingdom of Sorrow (featuring members of Hatebreed and Crowbar) and Portland’s thrash- lords Toxic Holocaust. Yeah, I own them, too! 
 
                                                                                                              -Sleazy P. Martini 
                                                                                                              Manager of GWAR.